Wednesday, April 10, 2013

L is for Love

Shouldn't this be the easiest one to write? After all, we were married. Doesn't that mean that I loved Ex and he loved me? Isn't love a prerequisite for marriage? If not, should it be?
The tyranny of the "should"s. Anyone who has spent any time in therapy has probably heard this phrase. I don't know who to attribute the phrase to, but it's a good thing I don't, because I hate it. I grew up "should"-ing myself. It's how I got through life up until now.

Now I'm trying to live without all of the "should" burden. It's a lot harder than one might think. For example, this post is called "L is for Love" and "should" be about love, shouldn't it? "Should" doesn't look like a word anymore. I should know how to spell it by now, at least.
So, maybe Ex should have loved me or not married me. I don't know for sure. All I know is that I loved Ex and thought he loved me. I should have known better.

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Don't make me talk to myself, yo.

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